Live Life

This past Saturday was such an inspiration to me.  Our church held it's very first LIVE LIFE Health Fair.  The idea behind this "jump start to healthy living".  As people walked around and visited the booths, talked, laughed, worked out.....I was overcome with emotions.  To think that at one point in my life......I JUST DIDN'T CARE.

I just didn't care about....
1.  my weight - as long as I never got on a scale, it was okay
2.  my size - thank goodness for stores that now sell plus sizes
3.  my attitude - this is the way God made me, I'm short and I'm big bone and flat footed
4.  my view on life - as long as I am living for God nothing else matters because this is not even my heavenly body, it is so temporary
5.  my goal in life - I really didn't have one
6.  my family - oh yeah, I love my family and all, but apparently dying because I am obese was far from my mind
7.  my thoughts - as long as I kept them all inside, no one would have to know
8.  my marriage - I have me a man that loves me and that's all that matters, he is too kind to ever tell me anything
9.  others - IT'S NONE OF YOUR BUSINESS
10.  money - it costs too much to pay for a gym, to eat healthy, to even try something...I can't afford it

So here I am sitting here writing because it hits me at the weirdest times of the day....LOL.  But it is so real....I JUST DIDN'T CARE.

Here is how I feel today....
1.  my weight - I can't believe that I carried so much weight on this 5' frame.  I still hate scales, but hey, they really do speak the truth.  Another reason I hardly would go to the doctor because they would tell me I needed to lose weight.  I am looking for some pictures that I have, they show me probably at my heaviest, but I never knew how heavy because I did not get on a scale.  At the health fair, I was actually excited to step on the scale at one of the booths so that I could be told my results:
Weight 156.2
BMI: 30.5
Body Fat%: 33.8%
Body Fat Mass: 52.6lb
Body Fat Range: HEALTHY
Fat Free Mass:  103.4 lb
Visceral Fat Rating:  8
Body Water%:  46.3%
Body Water Mass:  72.4lb
Muscle Mass:  98.2lb
Bone Mass:  5.2lb
Basal Metabolic Rate:  1405 kcal
Metabolic Age:  47 years old
Daily Calorie Intake:  2304 kcal
Physique Rating:  6-Standard Muscular

2.  my size - do you know how hard it truly is to find plus sizes for someone short like me?  Do you know how many blouses/tops that I had to buy even bigger than I needed them because I DO NOT HAVE ANY BOOBS, but my stomach area was too big for the blouses/tops so I had to go even bigger.  Everything is TOO LONG....I am so short.  When I finally began to lose the inches...wow!  In my 47 years of life, the biggest size I ever bought was 22/24.  When I went with my nutritionist 9 months ago I was wearing a size 18.  Today I wear a size 8.  Do you know how hard it still is to buy clothes???  LOL because I am short.....in the words of my nutritionist..."you are a petite woman".  Yep....I have learn to say..."I am petite".  I love to be able to go to any store and just look on the racks for size 8.  Sometimes I don't even try on, I just buy....SCORE!

3.  my attitude - yes God did make me 5ft tall, flat footed and with some German blood in me.  But here is something I've learned in my walk...I represent Christ.  I honestly feel that if Christ would of been overweight/unhealthy don't you think the writers of the bible would of mentioned that?????  I remember them mentioning in the bible about a prophet being so overweight that he fell over and died!

4.  my view on life - I have been a Christian since like forever.  I have had my RUN AWAY from God, but here I am today living for him, working for him, representing him.  The bible does say we are not here forever.  The bible says we will leave these temporary bodies one day and join him with our new heavenly bodies.  Here's what I think...NOW...God loaned me this body...shouldn't I take care of it?  It's not like I can go in every 10 years and get a newer model/upgrade.  This is another reason I no longer drink.  I just feel that this part of my life of drinking practically destroyed me.  Would I like a drink, sure, will one hurt me???  Me..yes.  (Another one of those deep secrets I held on to)

5.  my goal in life - I basically feel that here is where a lot has happened.  Ever since I have been in full-time ministry (since 1987), I have NEVER DONE ANYTHING FOR ME.  What's my goal in life:  live for God, enjoy every moment of my life with my family, fall deeper in love with my one true love - Ramon Portillo, start my own event planning business, RUN A MARATHON!!!!

6.  my family - the kids love their mom, cuddle with mom, see mom as mom, the kids are growing up and mom worries that she is not feeding them right, the kids have struggles, the kids today now see mom that she has admitted to her unhealthy life-style and she is doing something about it.  the kids understand that mom has struggles, but she is a survivor.  the kids need to know that mom wants the best for them and she wants to be around for A VERY LONG TIME.....to love them, cuddle them, cuddle their babies and so on........

7.  my thoughts - deep down inside are the darkest hurts/fears/losses/victories...that is why I blog and share.

8.  my marriage - to the one true guy that never ever told me that I was ugly, overweight, stupid....he fell in love with me.  He chose me.  Most of all, he has held my hand since day one and he continues to hold my hand.  Everyday I fall madly in love with him.  Everyday I miss him when he is not around.  Ramon and I have shared the same job for 26 years.  We are so use to being with each other all day long and we wouldn't change it for the world.  He is not sick of me and I am not sick of him.  He gets on my nerves and I get on his nerves.  I make him laugh and he makes me smile.  He has seen me for who I am and I have seen him for who he is.....and we remain as one.  We have faithfully kept our eyes on each other and no one else.  He still makes my heart go pitter patter and I still turn him on.  He loves my body and tells me and I love his!  And honestly, all the weight loss has been great for our sex life.  I am now pre-menopause so we are going through changes, but we can roll with it!!

9.  Others - yea pretty much if you ask me, "how I lost the weight", "what am I doing", "what do I eat", "where do I run"....I'll answer.  If people don't ask, I won't stand on a street corner and shout it.....I just blog, I share, I answer......

10.  money - pretty much if you can keep spending money on take out food instead of groceries, your always going to use this excuse.  I get it, I'm busy too and sometimes I do not have time to cook.  But I figure this...If I have time to watch a 2 hour football game, I can cook.  If I have time to go for a one hour run, I have time to cook.  If I have time to go to a party and stay there for 4 hours, I have time to cook.  If I have time to watch my favorite TV show and about 5 episodes in all one sitting, I have time to cook.  I figure, If I can dedicate 2-3 hours of cooking on a Sunday afternoon, I can get a whole weeks work of food cooked and ready....and the money I am saving my family.  Sure Ramon and I go out to eat, but not everyday.  I also figure, if I can't afford a membership at a gym that I probably won't go to as much, then just get up and go walk, run, ride a bike, chase your kids, buy a $3 ball at wal-mart and play with the kids, take the dog(s) for a walk, park far away in the parking lot every where I go and walk, take the stairs instead.....yea you get the picture.  We always have money for the things we WANT and cry about.....but we never have enough money to DO THE THINGS WE KNOW ARE GOOD FOR US.

Check out the chart you can see my journey since day one in June of 2013.